I want to do it before I don’t want to do it anymore

I was privy to a conversation last night that had me chuckling still this morning.  I walked into Jim’s house last night to find him on the phone with his son, a 40-something retired cop.  It was on speaker phone since Jim prefers not to have to hold his phone.  He was explaining to his son about his latest purchase.

Now before I go any further, let me remind you that Jim is still a daredevil at 74.   Think of all the stupid stuff you see guys in their 20s and 30s doing on America’s Funniest Videos.  Well, Jim hasn’t progressed much beyond that point.  He was the one who went into the pool last News Years Eve, fully clothed, in 30 degree weather.  He’s continually bugging me to go ziplining.  You got the picture?  Right!  He’s a 74 year old adolescent. Someone really needs to film him sometime and submit the video.  I may just have my opportunity.

So, back to the phone call.  Jim said to Danny, “I bought a unicycle.”

” A what?”

“A unicycle, but this one is motorized.”  unicycle (640x640)

Then I heard Danny say the exact same thing I said when Jim showed me the picture.  “You’re going to break your hip.”

Now picture this overweight, out of shape fool with bad knees. I know — disaster waiting to happen. When he got the email or post on Facebook -wherever- about this Tesla, Segway kind of thing, but without any handle bar or seat, I tried my best to discourage him by telling him he would break his hip – or leg – or elbow – or knee.  When that wasn’t having any effect, I resorted to the heavy artillery.  “If you break your hip, you won’t be able to do anything and I’ll have to get a new boyfriend.”  Obviously that threat wasn’t of any consequence because the next day he told me he ordered one.

Back to the phone call.  “You’re nuts!  You’re going to get hurt.”  “No I won’t. It’s easy. If I can’t do it, I’ll give it to Shane.”  (One of his college age grandsons).

The call ended with Danny telling Jim, “Stop spending your money on stupid stuff. Love ya. Bye.”  That’s the line that had me chuckling first thing this morning.  It seems dad and son have traded places.  I can remember my husband telling our son that when he was in college.

When I was talking to Jim this morning and telling him I kept laughing thinking about Danny’s parting remark, he agreed they had changed places — a long time ago!  Then we got into a discussion of spending money willy-nilly.  Perhaps his money burns a hole in his pocket?  “That’s what my daughters told me.”  Seems he’s been getting it from all fronts.

After a little more discussion, we finished with him reminding me that he was 74.  How many more years did he have?  He told me, “I want to do it before I don’t want to do it anymore.”  I announced that that was a great blog title!  End of the story.

*Read and approved by: Jim


I just want to have fun!

Everyone has been asking why I haven’t written anything lately.  Well … two of you did.  But, who’s counting?  I’m sure that as you read this, the rest of you are saying, “Yeah, she’s back!”  Is that unbridled, enthusiastic clapping I hear?

Where have I been?  Having fun, of course.  After all, I’m retired and happy.

It began back at the end of February into early March with a trip to the Gulf Coast of Florida.  Friends from Pennsylvania rent an apartment on Anna Maria Island for several months of the winter.  After being asked to come stay with them several times over several years, I found I had no schedule conflicts and why pass up a free stay?   I mean, really!  They’re paying the rent, which must be considerable, and all I had to do was eat and drink!  This apartment was on a block long street with the Gulf to the right and some bay to the left. Tampa?  Bradenton?  Remember, I’m retired — and my short term memory is practically none existent.

I so wanted to go to this!

I so wanted to go to this!

We went out barhopping one day and found a local hangout that was a hoot — the Drift Inn.  I so wanted to go to their pajama party that night.  After all, it was be there or be square and I’ve had a life long fear of being square! But, we had to pass along our regrets –full schedule and all that!  I’m sure they missed us.  We do bring a party to life, after all. I think we had to go to bed early that night. Or something like that.

Did I mention that Florida drivers make me nervous?  Don’t ask me why since I lived in Southern California for 22 years.  Go figure.  Or maybe it isn’t Florida drivers.  Maybe it’s Jim.  Please, don’t tell him I said that!   Okay, so he already knows. Honestly, I didn’t mean to push that dent into the dashboard.  It just happened when I was using my imaginary brake since I have to push so hard to make it work.

We were back home a few weeks when we left for a trip out West.  I have a timeshare in Laguna Beach, CA that I haven’t used in I don’t remember how long.  The last several years I’ve offered it for free on Facebook if someone would just use my week. No takers.   Now all I’ve heard recently from friends is, “I would have loved to use it.  I love Laguna Beach!”  I guess they don’t read my posts on Facebook any more than they do this blog.  Hmmm….

We flew to Las Vegas to spend a few days, first, since Jim had never been there.  There is something so vibrant about that place.  You feel the need to gamble even when you don’t like gambling, don’t you?  I have to confess though, I miss all the coins dropping into the metal bowl at the bottom of the machine.  Ca-ching, ca-ching!  It just isn’t the same playing with credits. Or just plain ol’ losing your money.

We spent one day going out to the Grand Canyon.  I’d been there when my kids were young, but this time we went to the 0312151313bSkywalk. Let me start out by saying Jim is a daredevil and I hate being a wet blanket. I’m afraid of heights, by the way, but I was determined to do the Skywalk, even if it meant crying like a baby. This was huge!  My daughter will tell you about the time we went up to the second level on the Eiffel Tower and after getting off the elevator, she found me with my arms wrapped around a post with tears streaming down my face. Wimp!  Well, wimp no more.  With ticket in hand and booties on my feet, out I walked.  Hallelujah!  They had solid panels along the edges!  Only the center was see through. The elevation is 4770 feet down. Makes me dizzy just typing that, but as Dora would say, “I did it!”


On to Laguna Beach!  Did I mention I don’t like Nevada and California drivers?  No?  Well, I should have.  Despite everyone doing their best to kill us, we made it safely to the timeshare. Take that, drivers!  We explored and visited old friends in Orange County and San Diego.  I got lost looking for my old house.  How embarrassing!  Especially when we had a GPS. None of my friends looked a day older than when I left in 2002. I had the best time.  It was like I never moved and we never skipped a beat.  But, alas, we needed to get home.  We still had more fun to experience.  But that’s the next installment.  Part two, as they say. Catch ya’ later…